FB Status'

In my room, eatin burritos. I hear a loud smash, then shards of glass grind with the road. I move over to the window to see anything. Everyone is okay. A woman yells "It's okay, I have insurance" The opposite driver cries out "Do you think that's gonna pay for my car? I haven't got a licence!" Then they both just drove off... All in under a minute.


R Cooper on a Saturday night

John Carter Trailer

On the top comments:

"You are ugly, but you are beautiful.
/FACEPALMED."

Controversial Boob feeding

Reading this article about Sesame Street and breastfeeding - how some people think breast feeding is offensive (I think it's not cuz it's natural) and I see this comment:

"Can I give my a woman a cumshot in public if she needs a protein fix? After all, it's only natural. :D"
Reply: "No, and no, it's not."

Facebook Status from Diana

"Now Diana, you've almost been working here for a year so I would hope you would know correct phone etiquette by now"
D - "Yeaaaah..."
"So maybe next time when a colleague is in the loo you could say 'She is currently away from the desk at the moment' not 'Ahh, I think she went for a quick piss, maybe call back in 5? Or longer in case it's not a piss?'"
D - "Right...Shall keep that in mind next time"

How am I not fired?

Some intense kissing scenes go like:

That's not even a lip-kiss! That's a "I'm going to consume your internal organs" mouth-to-mouth asphyxiation with tongue.

Little sister with friends say:

"I can see why animals bite now, it's so much fun!"

Milo and Milk on Facebook

Ah... yes well you see Mum, if i didn't give the Milo equal rights as the milk, im pretty sure that would be considered racist. I'm just trying to do the right thing here

FB Analysis comments

THAT'S US! If we Strangeways this, you'll notice that we are hugging in the corner of the screen. Coupled with the lack of facial identity, it appears we are 'hiding' our love. However, we are in the foreground; completely exposed. This suggests that while our love is secret, we yearn for it to be out in the open :D

Michael Buble

Look at one of the most liked comments:

"Dear world,

Sorry about Justin Beiber, hopefully this guy makes up for it.

Regards,

Canada "

A New word for the dictionary - Imocaj

Remember Dial-Up Internet?

"Hey, Remember when the computer had to make that buzzing noise to connect to the internet?"
"Yeah, I rememember. I liked that noise"
"Why would you like that noise?"
"It was a good noise. It was a noise of hope"

LOL

Encouraging words from Dad while shooting hoops

"Watch her as she catches the ball with her face!"

Uni life with Tina

"University chemistry is like getting to the last Harry Potter book and finding out Snape is actually a woman; completely random, difficult to come to terms with, but also explains a lot." - Tina B

House party on Saturday

Someone did an epic fail at playing uno and said: "Got a suicide room?"
Answer: "Microwave?"

People don't want me tagging them in photos

I was under the assumption that tagging photos was what lots of people on fb want. Yet it is one of the most tedious and time consuming activities on fb (along with farmville and other zanga games). I was aiming to eliminate that task for everyone and tag the photo's of people I know in the pictures! Ah, I guess I'll just stick to uploading images

No one reads in here!

Look what I found on a back room door

Lol @ "I'm so deadly I can see in the dark"

Nursery Rhyme

What's more random than breaking out into a Nursery Rhyme song? Say u know this one:


Magalina Hagalina Oohkataka Wakataka
Owkomokopoko was her name!
She had two eyes in the middle of her head, one was green and the other was red!
Magalina Hagalina Oohkataka Wakataka
Owkomokopoko was her name!

FB concersation

Chantal; "i'm the loveable Yorkshire girl breadstick...and that is just the way it is. "

A sign I saw the other month

Dad's Dinner Prayer

Oh good Lord,

I Just don't know how

But thank you so much

for this super-duper chow!